


Tarot reading

by Raine_on_me



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Circus, First Meetings, M/M, Tarot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-02-23 00:08:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23035972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raine_on_me/pseuds/Raine_on_me
Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich
Comments: 12
Kudos: 44





	Tarot reading

The deck in front of Mickey was old. the only one his mother ever used in fact. It helped sell the illusion that the power was old; in the family for generations.Mickey knew his father was a crook, that it was all a hoax. But it didn't settle his stomach when his mother snuck him out of bed that night. Sitting him down at the 1980s mental dining table with a white doily tablecloth nothing on except the light humming above the stove. "You can never tell your father" she started her hand placed over the cards.There were seventy eight cards, only twenty two were major arcana. 

His mother smiled, lips pressed against each other. “You’ve seen what I can do, and I know the cards speak to you Mikhailo. You can’t pretend this is false.”

He was twelve. He didn't believe in monsters under his bed, Santa Claus, or Tarots. He believed in his father's anger, and pure hatred for anything different than he was. So to be possessed with magic as his mother suggested just wasn't going to happen.

"I ain't touching those" he assured her. 

"Someone will have to" she was ominous. "When I'm gone your father will need someone to continue this-- game of his." She paused "he's not nearly as good of a con man as he thinks he is. Only someone with the gift can keep someone in a reading long enough for your father and brothers to rob them blind. If I wasn't a true talent people wouldn't come back, people wouldn't believe, stay longer, you name it. We have a roof over our heads because of these cards." 

He couldn't argue that she believed every word she spoke.  
It wasn’t so much mickey didn’t believe in her or her cards. She was right the cards freaked him out a tingle sensation that he couldn't shake when he was near them; like the one he had right now. He just didn’t want to give in to… to them . He didn’t want to read his destiny in the cards, or have them say out loud things he burried down deep within himself

He wanted to escape this life. Being a freak at the circus, stealing to have food infront of them. If these cards were so powerful why didn't they live in A Manson. And of course his mother had given him the speech before that the cards didn't work like that, he couldn't use them to bet on the ponies.

Mickey took a breath. “I… I don’t know why I need to call on the cards, though,” . That was true without telling her his fears; though she'd be the only one in the house to understand; feeling different.

His mother gave a small smile. As if she knew better. “You’ll learn. After all, the cards seems to like you.” 

Mickey stood up. “Not tonight.”

"Not much more time to hide from this." She muttered

"Just teach Mandy" 

“I've tried, my boy, don't you think I've tried knowing that it would be easier on you if the cards spoke to her. They don't, but I know they've spoken to you" 

"If they can train a monkey to wear a hat and take money we can teach Mandy to deal cards." He was done with the conversation 

"Promise me, you'll use your gift Mikhailo. It will guide you--" 

"Fuck. fine mom" he walked away

Years later he'd regret that.

She slumped down in the chair flipping the cards knowing what she would see. The same thing that had been haunting her for days. The same thing that pulled at her heart causing a lump in her throat.  
The moon her fears and anxiety  
The ten of wands a card of struggle, being in over her head  
The ten of sword not only the card having a picture of a man dead with ten swords in his back but also the meaning of hitting rock bottom, feeling powerless or victimized, or being betrayed in some way.

Her time to have mickey trained in the cards was coming to an end and he wanted nothing to do with them; or her.

***************  
The last time his mother brought up the cards he was fourteen, she had a busted lip, Terry had been on a bender again. He never understood why the cards didn't warn her; or worse if they did why she didn't listen. 

"Mikhailo" she was the only one to still call him that "The cards want to tell you something"

"Ma, they're cards they can't talk" he rolled his eyes she was still pushing them on him when he had made it clear he wasn't a fortune teller. 

"You need to know…" she looked down at the table two cards laying on-top of each other. Mickey was still secretly learning all the card suits but knew the suit of wands meant fire it was the knight of wands coupled with the lovers card which is the ultimate in love, and unique bond. "Look for someone important. Fire will play a part in meeting them perhaps a literal fire or by campfire, candlelight. Perhaps even a firey personality" a side smirk similar to the one Mickey had appeared on her face.

"The cards tellin' you about my love life now? Perv!" 

"It's important. It'll make you happy. For you to finally be your true self."

"You think I ain't who I am?"

She didn't say anything. She didn't need to say anything they both knew he was lying. 

************  
His sister, Mandy took centre stage after their mother died, she had the look with dark hair matching eye makeup; the girl even wore a black veil as if a bride with the great beyond. Unfortunately she couldn't read cards for shit.

Mickey wouldn't say it but as a child he was scarred of the cards. He knew his mother was right when he passed Mandy the deck; not long after their mother was gone and Terry was what for someone to take her spot. And being so certain the deck of cards was in fire. He had tossed her the cards expecting to find bubbled and burnt flesh on the palm of his hand; yet nothing was there. 

Anytime Mandy wanted to practice her delivery she'd call on her favourite brother; mostly because he was always the least stoned, but something about how the cards always came out better, she'd bounce ideas off Mickey of why a card would flip and what it would mean. He had taught Mandy the blunt deck which was just flipping one card to get the blunt and honest truth.

Two of cups.  
Surprisingly similar to temperance. Mickey wondered if the cards were trying to reach him through Mandy. He obviously ignored it but the two of cups was about sharing and compromise, even though the two may disagree with certain issues. Well if that didn't sound like Mickey and his mother, fuck even Mickey with Mandy and how best to deal the cards. 

Mickey never told his family. But his mother had been right he had actual ability and he was now certain the cards spoke to him. As much as he tried to use the cards to help him gamble; it never worked that way. Stupid power it wouldn't give him the ability to get rich what was the point? Mickey thought. 

Mandy was dramatic and seductive and could say all the right words that she could sell the illusion common people that she was associated with the craft. So he let his sister take the lead, trying to give her advice and ability to read the cards quickly; going so far to make her cheat sheets to get people to sit with her longer equaling more money which would keep Terry happy. There father was determined to make the most money out of any sucker that came to the Fortune Teller; which meant early on when Mandy stammered over readings and people would leave unimpressed. Mickey protected Mandy from their father when he's get drunk and yell at her, before his hand could swing Mickey would comment "you think any those people would have stayed to listen to you're saggy ugly man balls tell them their future" it would always end with Mickey getting the beaten. But that was better than his father touching his sister, better than someone suggesting Mandy was a terrible tarot reader and suggest Mickey take her place. Maybe if they could find an angry Russian to marry in the family she could have done it, but Mickey wasn't offering to do that either.

When his mother had left a cryptic note with the cards about having to use the cards before the full moon in Pisces on the 18th birthday. Of course Terry thought it was shit, he had plans for Mandy to be using cards the very next day. He crumbled the paper and tossed it out immediately. It didn't stop the words seering into Mickey's mind. 

******  
His eighteenth birthday was tomorrow and he still hadn't dealt the cards yet.

He still knew that psychics and palm readers and fortune tellers were really all just cons: he'd been playing this game long enough to know that he had the ability to read people’s subtle cues and making vague claims that people would believe they were real.

But tonight he had to deal the cards with the hope of, answers to questions that plagued him for far too long. He was being nagged by his mother's dying wish, for him to have this gift. So he would do it. For her. And if it was all crap like he suspected he'd be done, he'd leave the circus, he'd finally get out from under Terry, let the family business crumble he didn't care anymore.

Glancing around the small tent, making sure his family wouldn't see him. The fair was slowing down, his brother would already be gone with the other misfits to go smoke by the lake. Mandy probably gone with some sap she showed the lovers card to and convinced him he'd get lucky tonight.  
Terry already slumped in his chair drinking, he wouldn't get up for anything now. Mickey was sure no one would come in this late. He sat at the small round table. Black tablecloth, black curtains, black--well everything; Mandy had a look and ran with it.

He opened the small wooden box Mandy kept the cards. He'd seen them a thousand times but this time he noticed them. The black and gold cards where the only thing that didn't look cheap in this whole place. He picked them up. The familiar tingle on his finger tips. Placing the cards down he cut the deck roughly in half. 

Something shifted next to the tents entrance. Mickey felt as if he was about to jump out of his own skin. He remained seated but his heart was racing. 

A customer? So late? Most of the festival lights were off. Mickey was not in the mood for late night customers. 

"Hello?" A confused voice called out "sorry do I have the wrong tent--" seeing Mickey at the table he stopped in his tracks

"Probably" Mickey interrupted

"There was a woman, dark hair, she's a witch or somethin'.."

"She ain't here. If Mandy pulled the lovers card for you and ya thought you might get some with her yer too late lover boy"

"Oh fuck no" obviously releasing how rude it sounded the man blushed "sorry, no shes not my type. It was actually a question about the cards." He looked at Mickey's hands seeing he had the cards out "maybe you can help.."

"Doubt it." Mickey scoffed 

“You’re a fortune teller?” He asked, his voice had a hint of sarcasm , “You don’t fit the part ---" Ian realized he should stop if he wanted help.

Mickey finally looked up to actual take in the person daring the talk to him. Tall; probably use to feel too tall and lanky but now sported a lean muscular body. Christel jaw line, sea green eyes and orange hair. 

"I can do a reading anywhere. All I need is a flat surface, and a tarot deck." Mickey wondered where he pulled that load of crap from. Apparently feeling challenged not looking the part but feeling he was about to find out he had more power in his fingertips than Mandy did in her whole body.  
"Ok sit down" he pinched the bridge of his nose, why would he do this? He's never read the cards for himself let alone someone else.

"Then why all this.. and Mandy?" Ian asked pulling the seat back, he was referring to her costume and all the tacky things dripping off the walls.

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips. He was bold, Mickey liked him. "Some people are comforted by it. Makes it feel real; seeing is believing after all." Mickey held tightly to the deck "but maybe for you seeing is deceiving" he arched an eyebrow perhaps proving that he could read him.

Ian didn't answer. He didn't want to give Mickey any kind of information, as a way of testing just how efficient those cards really were. Or if he'd been conned earlier or not.

"It's okay. I don't like em chatty anyway" Mick wanted to keep the upper hand not letting Ian's silent treatment stump him. "I just need you to answer a few things. Like your name

"Ian, Gallagher."

"Next question: why did you come here Ian Gallagher? Anything in your mind?"

"Nothin'…. Just curious." He was obviously hiding something

"You're not giving me much to work with. But I like a challenge." Fuck he needed to stop the banter he had no idea what he was doing."I'll need you to take your right hand and part the cards in the middle, making two piles--"

"Yes I am familiar with basic math" His smart ass tone caught him by surprise. He cleared his throat to hide the emerging laughter

Ian made the two piles of about the same height. "Do I need to feel them or hover my fingers over them until I feel an itch or anything?"

"A handsy guy huh? No no need to I got it from here." 

"So last time I was here I had asked--mandy" he hoped he remembered her name "if the cards were reversed when I looked at them or her, cause like they'd all be revised to me right …. She didn't likes being challenged" 

"Who fucking does?" With an arch of his eyebrow mick had a point. "I'm Mickey" surprisingly the silence was bothering him almost as much as the stunning green eyes across the table.

"So you don't need to see my hands?"

"This ain't a palm reading station" Mickey scoffed. But he could assume it was one of Mandy's off script ideas to hold hands with hot men. 

Mickey's eyes as if on queue looked down at the hands on offer, they looked as if they had a soft touch, from hands so large you would expect them to be rough and calloused but they appeared smooth. Probably not a mechanic; Mickey didn't need cards for that. 

Feeling embarrassed Ian swallowed and pulled away,  
The energy in the room built as Mickey slowly shuffled the cards. They looked old, delicate, as they fluttered in his capable hands as he seems to bend and float them to his will, before displaying them on the table in a simple three-card spread.

Mickey did the simplest thing he knew a past present and future. People always seemed good at filling in the blanks requiring little actual ability on the person dealing the cards. It's why he taught it to Mandy; fool proof or so he thought 

Ian was a complete stranger to tarot but he could see an intense connection between Mickey and the cards that Mandy didn't have. He hoped it ment he would get something insightful this time.

Ian held his breath. He leaned forward into the silence, his green eyes focused on those steady hands as the man reveals the ancient drawings.

Mickey's fingers stroked the top of the cards before placing them down on the table. Ian's chest rose and fell with each card 

A chill ran down Mickey's spine. Flipping each card. The three of swords. Meaning Heartbreak, emotional pain, hurt, sadness or loneliness; all very accurate for his own past. But not surprising that other people would have a disapproving past. "I assume the heart full of daggers is self-explanatory. Your past has hurt and you gotta Do whatever it takes to express your anger or pain to get past it or whatever."

The snap of the card hitting the table seemed to echo through the tent. The fool card reversed. Fuck the cards might be talking to him and not Ian but how would he know for sure, or worse how would he explain it 

"See this is where I asked why it's reversed if it's looking at me"

Weird the kid had gotten this card last time as well. Mickey shrugged it off "its reverse to me, cause I'm the one reading them." The obvious answer seemed to satisfy Ian 

"Does it also mean I'm an idiot like your sister suggested?"

Fuck Mandy. "It ah, means, you may fear the unknown, wondering like What am I getting myself into?--" fuck saying the words out loud was making it clear it was for him 

The last card turned. Temperance. Mickey's mouth was dry and his hand quivered a little. His mother once mentioned the temperance appeared to her the first time she flipped the cards and that she knew the temperance card would come to Mickey when he finally pulled the cards. 

The card was in the future, but it seemed like a future Mickey would never know; representing Balance and purpose. he knew It meant he was suppose to read the cards, speak to them, that he was suppose to be here. In that moment he felt like the worst son. His mother had tried to tell him, and getting through this would require her grace at the situation.

"I'm sorry" it might be the only time Mickey ever felt truely apologetic for something. 

"Why?" Ian confused by Mickey's obvious change in attitude. "Ain't your fault I got the same cards"

"What?" Mickey's eyes locked on Ian "No. But, these are my cards." There was no way the Ian and Mickey could have the same future; unless they were entangled somehow

"I don't understand" 

"Ah, um," Mickey rubbed the back of his neck he didn't understand either but that didn't seem like the professional answer. "hold on" Mickey gathered the cards cutting it into piles and giving a quick shuffle. He inhaled slowly. 

Blunt deck. One card. Tell it like it is. 

Temperance.

He shuffled again 

Temperance

The cards weren't going to let him deny his ability now. "here I'll do another one. On the house, of course" Mickey was using the kid as a guinea pig least he could do was not con him in this moment "whatdya want to know?" 

"Is it cliche or stupid to ask about love?"

"Yes" Mickey as blunt as the cards had been to him. "But if that's what you want firecroch" Mickey felt the air leave his lungs. It was just suppose to be an insult. But it reminded him of his mother's reading about love and fire. He was going to have to do the reading and prove it wasn't about him. 

It couldn't be.

It was an insult, nothing more. He didn't know the guy, probably had nothing in common with someone who came to a fortune teller for advice.

"Ok" Mickey cleared his throat feeling as if there hadn't been noise in far too long. "Like the three cards before but this time it'll be a card for you, partner, and the relationship..."

"I ain't got a partner"

That information shouldn't have made him as happy as it did. "Ah, well, they'll tell you about a partner suited for you." 

Mickey drew his eyes back to the cards as he shuffled.  
He placed the three cards face down. Slowly taking a deep breaths 

" Knight of wands: You are bold and courageous and willing to venture into unknown territories to further your mission and your dreams"

Ian nodded "yeah I guess that's true." 

Mickey didn't say anything it felt like he was jumping into the unknown even doing this.

Next card. "Reversed hierophant: it means whoever you're lookin' for is challenging the status quo … could be of their business or even small like the mindset of their house or somethin'. or they could be realizing a new Personal belief of themselves. Maybe they just realized their gay or some shit" Mickey swallows hard. Fuck that car could be him for sure. No that card was definitely him.

Last card "lovers card which is the ultimate in love, and unique bond."

"Wow, I haven't ever had a love like that." Ian's voice was soft almost embarrassed. 

Mickey could feel a lump in his throat he desperately wanted to avoid. He haphazardly cleared his throat "what made you come see mandy really?" He asked

"Work here, wanted to learn about the place." He shrugged 

Mickey shook his head "nah ain't never seen ya here before." 

"just started actually. I'm a dofer" which was a kinder word for medieval bitch. Someobe sent to do the bidding of all the carnies. He smuggled in the coffee; to keep in character and the illusion alive the workers of the fair were not allowed to be seen with Starbucks cups laying around their stations. Instead Ian would leave get the drinks and pour them into horns or tiny wine barrels made to look like mugs. He also had to be the idiot standing with an apple on his head for the Archer, shovel horse manure, he had to clean the costumes, deal with lost kids, and got a lot of the heckling from audience goers. It wasn't glamorous. But this shit was better than what he had left. 

Ian then went into his back story that he finally fulfilled every cliche and ran away from home; previously he got drunk and got a tattoo he regretted. Had boyfriends that were emotionally abusive, left the army, became a club dancer, left his life as an EMT, had gone to jail, and had never truly known love or life. His life was total chaos having to come to terms with Monica's last gift to him; her genes and in the spinning bullet of roulette he was the Gallagher child to get her bipolar disorder. 

He had been in denial, booze, dancing, fucking anyone who'd pay had become easier than the life sentence of being crazy. Ian had let his bipolar control him into setting fire to a van and being sent to jail. Luckily he was let out of jail early and club dancers don't need to worry about a clean rap sheet. 

His dysfunctional home of five siblings who once we're each other's supports but now had an all for one mentality, his alcoholic, out-of-work Frank had finally used up his last bit of patience and last bit of hidden money. 

"So I left. Ran away and joined the circus." 

Throughout Ian's long and detailed past somehow Mickey's body leaned over the table closer to Ian needing to be close enough to hear every word, to watch his lips move. 

"I can't promise this ain't any less of a shitshow" Mickey said honestly "listen man, I gotta tell you somethin' about the cards." Figured if Ian was going to open up he should try a bit too. "I ain't never dealt the cards before this was my first time" 

"Why the fuck?…." he sighed throwing his body back in his chair. "Called you out on being a fraud shoulda listened to my gut." Ian wanted to feel rage he wanted to be angry "but--how were ya right?" He was more confused. He really felt Mickey understood him.

Mickey shook his head, maybe to scared to say it out loud maybe to scared to admit it. "I… I don't know ok. The thing is my ma was the one who could legit do all this. But she said I probably could too. But you don't know my ol' man he wouldn't--" Mickey stopped Ian didn't need to know about Terry. "Anyway she said I could do it, told some fairytale shit about reading the damn cards before my eighteenth birthday. When you walked in I was dealing the cards for me to see if I got played by my own mother." 

"Did you?" 

Mickey paused before answering "nah I don't think so. But you got the same cards when Mandy did it, and I was sure the cards were for me…" his words started trailing off.  
"Ian. This is going to sound crazy. But I think the cards are pushing us together" 

"I thought it was me pushing my chair closer to you but yeah sure we'll give this one to the cards" Ian had a way of lightening the mood. "Shuffle them again see what they say" 

Mickey shuffled again. One card  
King of swords  
" It's, ah The King of Swords it's like a sign of intellectual power or authority . It means, you are in your power, ruling from a place of authority and respect"

"So that cards you then saying you're suppose to do this that your mother was right?" 

"Or it just means I like to be in charge" he arched a brow. Ian obviously exuded sexuality and his banter started rubbing off on Mickey. "Your turn he said taking charge. Mickey fanned out the cards. 

"Page of wands" Ian turned the card over to show Mickey 

Mickey's hand rubbed across his face "With the Page of Wands, you are inclined to give anything and everything a go. You embrace the opportunity to start out on a new journey…..and seeing as you joined this circus I'd say that's damn accurate"

"Well shit" Ian was impressed. "So what do the cards to say to do next?" 

Mickey shrugged "fuck it let's find out" he flipped the first card  
King of wands  
"Passion, flirty oozing sexuality" Mickey's words stopped "this is definitely about you" he claimed.

"What?" Ian tried to take offense and tried to look surprised 

Next card was the Six of pentacles  
"The giver" his eyes narrowed in on Ian hoping he understood the card

Next card the devil. Mickey could feel the sweet beading down the back of his next he was going to have to tell Ian about the card. 

"That looks bad" 

"It's not, it's about fire, and passion, hot sex" how the fuck was he getting turned on by a deck of cards? 

"And you still think our futures are connected" the sly grin on his face couldn't be contained 

"Well... I'd um--" his sentence was cut off by the swoosh of the cold breeze coming into the room, followed by Mickey's father. 

Mickey jumped, his knee banging the underside of the table. The cards went skittering out of his hands, spilling across the table. He'd never felt so visible shaken before

"Wh-da-fuck you doing sittin' there?" Terry's drunk ass bellowed. "Ain't no son of mine dealing cards of the fucking mystic." His stance uneven but his eyes lazer focused on the two men. The decision to beat Mickey written all over his face.

"Fuckin' relax Terry. He came in lookin' for Mandy he's just leavin'" 

The information shocked Ian he thought they were connecting, he knew Mickey liked him just hadn't gotten the words out yet. Now he was nearly being pushed out the door. Mickey's eyes grew hopefully wielding Ian's mouth to stay shut.

"He ain't walkin'!" Terry stated "and don't explain why you're sittin' there" 

"I can't fuckin' sit now?" 

"Can't tell if you're brave or stupid challenging someone who could control your fate" Ian barked. 

"Listen Boy this shit ain't real." 

"Just leave it Ian" Mickey spoke out of the corner of his mouth

"He's scared" Ian tried to convince Mickey "bet he'd run out of here crying like a school girl if you read his cards." 

Mickey still wasn't sure if he believed in the powers of the cards but he believed Ian. And he believed they were destined for more than this one encounter, to be kept away all because of Terry. They both watched Terry as Mickey collected the cards. Fear filled his eyes while a snarl came across his lips trying to keep his intimidating posture. 

Mickey was risking everything to trust in Ian, to trust in the card, and in himself. He twitched his nose inhaling deeply. 

"8 of Swords... looks like the cards know your scared there pops" Mickey could hide his smirk. " And the devil" he arched an eyebrow 

"Wait I thought the devil was passion…." 

"Yeah for us--you" he quickly corrected his Freudian slip "for Terry here, especially coming up next to the eight of swords would imply some jail time is in his future." Mickey paused looking at Terry trying to read his poker face. "Are ya sure you covered your tracks? With the drugs? Maybe the AKs ? What else you been up to?" By sheer dumb luck Mickey's sentence was interrupted; police sirens about a block away by the sound of them. 

"You're a God damn witch like your mother" he hissed. Terry couldn't hide the fact he was scared shitless. He stumbled a few times trying to decide if he had more to say or if he had enough time to flee before cops showed up. He chose to leave. 

"How the fuck did that just happen?" Mickey's body started to relax back in the chair. 

"You might have magical powers mick, but I have the power of technology and a drunk boomer" Ian showcased the app of noises including sirens. "Between the cards and the look on his face I figured a little push might help…I mean what did the cards call me a page of something always up for an adventure" 

"If after all this you plan on stayin' I'll show you an adventure" Mickey promised

"And hot sex, it was in the card mick"


End file.
